The end of a year

Mom is healing and recovering nicely. I was incredibly sick yesterday but a magnesium infused iv and some compazine made me better for today. Sitting with my best friend, angel, and mom now. Happy new year may you find strength in your trials and triumphs and pure peace with your blessings love, Chelle 

Mama

I haven't posted in a very long time. I went on a vacation and virtually quit because Apparently I never came back. (Aw man wish it was a real vacation not an anology) My faith and love for God however did not leave my side. I just simply felt like a copy machine making copies over and over of the same stuff I'd already written. But mostly I didn't feel inspired by the lord as I did in the begging. I have felt I needed to take time and ponder life and find inspiration. I guess I haven't been on vacation. I signed up for a treasure hunt!  I found that inspiration today. My Mother. She has a big surgery today to remove part of her colon.  It's been an awful day

After being  hospitalized for the week of thanksgiving (a new family tradition we are not fond of and are stopping) My mom is doing the normal things but it breaks my heart because those normal things hurt so bad she is so sick. My heart dropped to the floor seeing my rock be so bad off. All day Martina McBride "I'm gonna love you through it" has been playing in my head. I will love my momma through her pain as age always does mine so gracefully and God will love is both as always through it. Please pray for my mama, I love her so much and we need all the reinforcement we can get. So whatever it you are going through please know God loves you very much and he will "love ya through it!" God gives us trials to strengthen is this I know. Love, Chelle 

My Rock

Gods love for us is divine and individual. He knows when we need his comfort. All we have to do is ask and pay attention. Tonight I asked for him to give me a sign that he is there and I am okay. (Which I am) but you know when you are a kid and you need the monsters on the closet checked out before going to sleep... Well I just needed my loving Heavenly Father to comfort me and chase my monsters out of my closet before bed tonight. I just needed that trusting care and love that makes you know you are okay at the end of the day...this song http://youtu.be/oJVv5kjOJhU as playing and I suddenly felt the need to listen to the lyrics. I think the message is clear. Heavenly Father is my rock. The one thing I can count on no matter what. What a comfort that is. I love him so much!!-Chelle 

cold intolerance

It is finally cold where I live now. I am dealing with once again not being able to regulate my tempature. Now it's shivering to death for hours at a time. I have been sick today. But I am learning wearing a beanie when shivering and it just isn't getting better tends to really help me! Well wishes!-Chelle 

fill in

Yes I had a good day this week! Go me!! I drove my beloved Herbie, left the house, put makeup on, did my hair, and went to the store (gasp) it's such a pain being so weak and I'll. the tasks that seem so simple are far from to my body.... But I am learning to have a much higher appreciation for simplicity! 

On anther update concerning the past week, I am having a problem. I can't quit eating by mouth I am starving. I can throw up and literally just think about eating. I vent out what I eat by mouth mostly through my g tube in my tummy that's the big tube connected to the ziplock (yes it's gross) then I feed through the other tube my formula ... That's called the j tube. I am sick of feeling like I am starving and no matter how sick, the price I pay for eating, my fake but very real starvation is out of control. That's what is going on much love to you! xo-Chelle

Back at it

I am happily back home currently feeding through my working j tube. Yay! The endoscopy went good. I had scary low blood sugar levels when I arrived to the hospy. Luckily I have my glucose meter to test my blood sugar levels. I ended up on the hospy floor ew gross! This geemaphobe did not even care. They ended up pushing glucose through my Iv we didn't use my port.                             I am feeling better slowly but oh so worn out! My brain as weird as this sounds feels stronger today. I plan on more resting today. Oh and looking through the internet staring at pediatric wheel chairs. I can walk and all. But when I am out for a long time I get sick from my postural Orthostatic tachy syndrome a.k.a POTS. So instead of locking myself up in my bed I am looking at this as a tool to help me get out and about like I used to do. Now will I use this daily or everytime I leave my house? No way, I have two good legs that u will use I just need help when they get floppy lol ... It's stressful trying to find a wheel chair and what you want I. One. Wish me luck because I am back at it again! Not giving up on this #dysautonomia fight! This photo was right after surgery a little puffy swollen.-Chelle

September

September has just been survival mode for me. My j feeding tube recoiled back into my stomach within days of fixing and it's been a fight to say the least to get help. I will be getting a new feeding tube Thursday. I have lost 15lbs this past month and I feel like crap. I am a fighter. This my Heavenly Father had made clear to me this month. Sometimes I wonder if I got myself in over my head in the pre existing... Oh but what glorious blessings lay ahead one day. Conference was a joy as usual and a great comfort to me. October is Dysautonomia awareness month. Go turquoise!!! For all the fighters who fight alongside me, we got this to learn more about Dysautonomia and how you can help: http://www.fundcourage.org/