Thursday, April 9, 2015

Butterfly is coming out of her Cocoon

These are my "Hollywoods" as my grandma S. Calls sunglasses. It's rather cute of her I think! 
Listening to love at home by the tabernacle choir, what a way to put the spirit in my heart! Feeling full of my Savior's love for me. In these simple moments of a song, I grow a stronger grasp of my testimony, and all life's purposes... yesterday was a fight day. A day of me trying to improve myself for the better. I get easily upset when dealing with medical testings. I think because I know my body so well and I had to fight for so many years...It's just my reaction now. I am working on changing that. Why upset myself when I don't have to be? I also felt very sickly during the two hour wait for my stat X-Ray of my feeding tube. But I got through it and I am proud. I can choose to look down upon myself in these moments or I can choose happiness, bravery. It took a very long time to come to terms I couldn't will the sicknesses away. Even longer to come to terms that I truly can't judge my happiness by how I am physically. I have to adjust. Sure bad days come, and bad days go...every one has them! Maybe in different situations, not their health but others get upset just the same...stressed, sad, mad. Everybody has emotions and problems in life. Mine just happens to be my body and health.  I have suppressed life long enough. Time to move forward. To be happy to the fullest of my abilities. Time to grow spiritually. I will always be sick, but that is NOT something that devalues me in any shape or form.(nor you) Look for happiness outside your health, set reachable goals. Put your focus on the Lord. Let the spirit guide you like a compass. Put others first if possible for you with your health. Simple acts of kindness, I can say are total 360s. That kindness turns right back to you, is contagious and more hearts will be filled with joy and look love! If you're feeling low put some makeup on, fix your hair... even if it's just for you. We don't need makeup to be beautiful, beauty in inside us, but it can lift my spirits when feeling low. Stay strong the Lord loves you. Jesus Christ loves you. Always, dream big, reach for those stars. Laugh out loud daily. But cry if you need. You are a super star! Believe in yourself and I will believe in me! -Chelle

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