Wednesday, August 12, 2015

Scars & Hearts

Today I noticed the dinkyest little scar that is above my collar bone. From my port placement. I mean I is like a millimeter... BUT for the first time I actually saw it in the mirror. I normally never notice it (I mean like I said it is so extremely small) I did not like it though. I felt very uncomfortable. Then I started thinking of the scaring that is starting from poking needles through my port. I know it's just a matter of time before that gets noticeable. More prominent. I have small scars on my abdomen from prior laparoscopy surgery, two for Endometriosis a few from getting my appendix and gallbladder removed. More dinky scars. Then I have the tube sticking out of my stomach. That tube that sustains life for me. That tube is literally the reason I am alive. Yes, I do sometimes realize or obsess over dinky scars and a tube. I am human after all. I do realize I could have bigger and more obvious apparent disabilities or disfigurements. I know more scars are bound to come after all I am chronically fabulous you know?! I always remember this one of my favorite songs by MIndy Gledhil "it's not about your scars, it's all about your heart" this is so true! the true beauty is inside us in our hearts! Our spirits are where our beauty resides and what is in our hearts is most important! God loves us and knows our hearts. So today when you dab on the makeup, fix your hair, dress yourself wear your heart as your greatest acceasory! It's the best you have got in this life. Yours truly-Chelle