I had an wonderful day and spent over an hour on pinterest, dreaming of having a house one day and of course filling it with wonderful décor! For the first time in maybe even years I actually allowed myself to DREAM.... dream of a life, even as I was dreaming, something was different about these new visions stored in my head. I didn't have the perfect house, nor the perfect life. I even envisioned myself as chronically ill. I have never done that before. Never ever have I accepted myself as a chronically ill person. I learned something in this hour... life doesn't have to be perfect for me to have happiness. My body doesn't have to be perfect or normal to feel alive inside. moping will always occur (which we all know I will tend to do at times, sorry when you are chronically ill, this is just part of the territory. I know I will always to compare myself to the little thriving girl I was before I was sickly. My heart just yearns for her.) but I can still fly as high as the sky will let me! Faith and a little more patience then I ever thought possible and that mountain my friends, I will be on top with a huge flag. The words will read, "not only survived but conquered." I will also be wearing stiletto heels, they keep me closer to heaven :) speaking of heels I got a new pair I gifted to myself yesterday....I have the hardest time finding heels that fit with my child sized feet, so I just had to get them.
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