Saturday, August 30, 2014

Go Vs. Not to go

To go, or not to go. That is the question haha...
I just got a text from my sister asking if I wanted to go to Wal-Mart with her.
The old me would of said yes and never thought twice. Then new me has to go into a whole review and weight the pros and the cons... I fight in my head if it is worth it, if I will feel good, if I will have fun, if I will be too tired, if  I will get there then be ill.... the list goes on and on...And It is hard, it's a battle  that unfortunately comes with the territory. It never gets easier and I always am left with a feeling of guilt or sad I missed out when (on nights like tonight) when I weigh a big fat NO. Then if I go I am nervous or I tend to get there and I am just miserable... now the odds sometimes play in my favor and I win a victorious good healthyish time.
Oh, in the life of a chronically ill person.
this is my thinking face haha...

I am trying this whole thing where when I am upset or frustrated I listen to hymns...
it has a 98% successful outcome!
He is there!
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