Monday, May 19, 2014

My Book of Faith


My Book of Faith
This weekend I had a heavy heart yet, Jesus let it be filled with warmth and good and love.... the new diagnosis is wearing off from yay to urgh... The realizations of a new disease living and coping. Can't seem to get my salt diet right or my water right... medications/new life style is adding up... ONE just ONE of my new medications is roughly $1,000.00 A MONTH! I keep reminding myself how I need to stop and be grateful for the diet, the treatments, the help, the hope and I know that is what My Heavenly father wants me to do so. Also, We had a scare this past weekend with a precious loved one being very ill, scary ill would be the definition...such a sweet little baby that was very sick...So as my heart hurt for her and her family...and my mind worried... I needed to do something to help me feel better. I prayed the whole day and I am happy to announce she is doing better not necessarily great but better. God has answered our prayers! I have taken my courage and I spent all day Saturday in my scriptures just soaking up all those "sticky notes" and highlighted parts that have lifted my heart so much in good times and bad. I have been really wanting to put all of those little words of god into a sort of scrapbook so I could just pull out my favorite versus and fill my heart up... So I wrote, and I wrote, and I wrote. lol I still have a ways to go and am starting to wonder if this book will be having a  volume 2 or 3 haha... but just tonight it served its purpose I felt down a little and it reminded me of the important things and made my bad feelings lessen. I already have so much love for this little glued together simple book of faith (not that this book makes my faith, I do that but it is a wonderful thing) Being sick is a trial and trials are tough but I can honestly say if I were asked today if I could have my sickness taken from me all these years and go back and live a "normal" life, I would say no... I have gained such beautiful blessings through my hard times and I have learned very much which makes this tough journey worth every enduring second. I know with my faith and my Redeemer I can endure all hardships.
Started out with my favorite scripture quote
D&C 84:88
I will be on your right hand and on your left,
 and my spirit shall be in your hearts and mine angels round
about you to bear you up.

Meg Johnson's
 Another thing I am doing thanks to Meg Johnson I decided when I feel like I can't do it anymore or when I seem focused on the negatives I will simply start writing all the things "I can" and I have a notebook just for it and honestly it works great... gets me feeling grounded again. after a few minutes of it I fell asleep last night and in a much better happier grateful mood! So Thanks to her awesome inspiration <3 I am truly thankful for every single thing that I do have, & I may not have everything (but no one does) and material things are just things they all kinda make us happy for a minute and then in time that happiness wears off... but with family, health, faith, & friends those important things never loose their value now do they?? I feel humbled right now... a little nervous ...either way god will get me through it. <3